Moving On From A Relationship
Here are 9 ways to help you move on:
After a relationship ends whether with a lover, a friend or a family member the loss can feel overwhelming. If the relationship is important it hurts. Anxiety and a gamut of other feelings may emerge. Some people choose to numb themselves with distractions. Distractions come in many forms. Alcohol , drugs, binging on Netflix or other forms of media. Some people find another relationship to escape the pain of loneliness or at times express anger and hurt in destructive ways. These methods numb or help to distract from the pain and hurt. When the deepest part of you is feeling lost, social isolations is another option when you just don’t feel strong enough to be with others without feeling vulnerable.
I find that if you give yourself a couple of months to really let yourself explore and feel the hurt and discover what you can learn from the loss when you see it as a new beginning and an opening to new opportunities.
I have outlined some powerful practices that have helped many, including myself through periods when reality cracks and we see our vulnerability, our humanness that breaks through our ego to a place where we cannot only heal but become a stronger new version of ourselves.
All of this sounds wonderful but when you are going through the loss, the memory of when love, laughter, deep connection , purpose and feeling alive keeps reminding us of our loss.
If you have to numb yourself do that but here is my recommendation for not just getting through a loss but healing and coming out stronger and capable of loving yourself before you seek love from another:
1. Make sleep a priority and develop a routine such as a hot bath or shower, cool temperature , clean soft bedding (You are worth it) and if you awaken during the night listen to a meditation or meditation music for healing and answers to your questions why? ’Silence is God’s language’ by Rumi.
2. Write down your plan for the next day. This keeps you accountable and ensures that you build healthy habits which will help you to heal and become stronger and happy again.
3. Get some exercise every day, start with stretching https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=apCFyZkHfss if your energy is low. Take a walk daily and while walking listen to nature or your favorite music if you need to be energized.
4. Write each morning what you are grateful for and at the beginning it may be that you have been given life, nature, loved ones etc
5. Very important…whatever you are feeling, anxious, sad, hopeless, angry, angry love yourself, show compassion for yourself…love yourself and when you get into that practice you will be ready to love another when the time comes.
6. Fast for minimum 14 hours a day (either skip breakfast or dinner) this gives the body a chance to heal and even promotes longevity. https://www.nad.com/news/david-sinclair-explains-how-to-live-longer-by-changing-the-way-we-eat.
7. Take vitamins and nutrients to boost your immunity https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YuO2FwBrmqY
8. Ask yourself what do I love? Start doing more of what you love. ‘What you seek is seeking you’. Rumi.
9. Give yourself a break from what you should do and don’t start new activities that distract you from your pain. It will pay off, Give yourself time, 2 months (we’re not getting any younger!)to work through this process Take more time if you need to.